God, why am I not posting in my LJ anymore? I mean, I find myself with so much time of nothing sometimes and yet... LJ gets lost in the cracks.

Umm, I guess an update is in order? Catch you all up to speed?

I have no real job on Prohibitive Standards and yet I keep finding myself working on something for it? Why? I don't know. The good thing though is that I am no longer on a running crew. I'm just an usher. I only have to be there Wednesday-Sunday. I got tonight and tomorrow off. Joy.

Started rehearsals on my show. I think it's all gonna be good... knock on wood. Once we have a set and such and I can get my hands on my full cast I'm gonna take you tube videos. Why? Cus I have nothing better to do with my life sometimes.

There has been a little drama of course. Sean hurt himself pretty bad. He's getting surgery on his knee Wednesday infact. So he had to be pulled outta Prohibitive. David (one of MY actors) took his place so I had to rearrange my schedule the last week and the rest of this one. Sean should be fine to go on at TNT though so that's good. If not... well let's just act like that's not gonna happen. And if if does... ugh...

Excitingness to report as well. Bob is getting us backstage to a show at Lincoln Center. Not as exciting as it would have been to get backstage at Producers (darn the dates not matching up with the Stage Managers vacation time!) Still, it should be fun. I'm also basically camping out for Spring Awakening On Stage tickets. I WILL get them damnit! I WILL!

That's enough rambling for now. I'm tired. I don't like this whole passing out before midnight stuff that's been going on lately. I miss my friends. I miss being up to talk to them :-(

WAHHHHHHHH! I just bought the rights to my show! I bought the rights to my SENIOR workshop!

God this is scary. This is it. This what the last four years were all about. And it's gonna be here SO soon. Then it's gonna be gone. Over and done.

Then what? O_o

Today in the city was a real interesting one. In good ways and in bad. I'll keep things short since I have a big LONG pensive thing to close with.

-NOTHING on TKTS worth seeing so tried to rush "Legally Blonde." Missed cut off by like 10 people so ended up buying full price tickets, but they were REALLY good seats.
-Did something we have not done in a LONG time. Went to the Central Park zoo. Got really good pictures of the sea lion feeding, turtles having an orgy (seriously), and was attacked by a big ass rain forest bird. That part was NOT fun.
-Went to the show, and it was pretty darn good. The first act I wasn't 100% thrilled with but act two made up for it. Cute, but no masterpiece of musical theatre.
-Stopped by "Beauty and the Beast" and made my peace with it before it closes tomorrow. Also got free leftover promo posters which they were just handing out in front of the theatre since they are no use after tomorrow.
-Wanted to eat at Pasta Dora since we have not eaten there in a LONG time, so we walked ALLL the way up there to find it is now a shoe story. We then walked ALLL the way back to eat at the place we ALWAYS eat out. Dull yes, but the door man knows us by now.
-Came home

That is the events of the day in a nutshell. Pictures of the sea lions, turtle orgy, and demon bird will come later. I promise.

Now onto the pensive part. I came to a really, REALLY important decision today because you may recall a live journal entry a few weeks ago in which I got really pensive about what I was gonna do with my life after school was over. Remember how I said that I was not sure if I would end up in New York, Orlando, or California? Well I came to a realization today...

I am NOT going to settle in New York!

The city use to excite me and I loved going there and doing things. Now, I come to find that whenever I go to New York it's the same old thing. I want to see a show and I find myself doing the same old things every time because there is just nothing exciting left for me to do. I use to love New York so much that I didn't even mind the smell of it (people that have been to New York know what I mean then I say that) but today I was literally gagging. And it was not just because I got terribly sick from a hot dog I ate at lunch (left that part out). It's sticky, it's noisy, it's nothing but cars and buildings and I just don't think I want that anymore. All New York has in the pro colum anymore is that it's got Broadway which has been disappoint lately. And I can get theatre other places to. It might be the most famous and top quality stuff, but it's not enough to move there for now.

FUCK! FUCK FUCK FUCK!

I found THE figurine I want for my show on ebay. She is EXACTLY what I want to the T! It was at $17.50 an hour ago. I just went and someone bid a fucking $27.50! I can't afford that for a figurine! It's gonna be another $9.00 shipping! That's over $30!

I am so upset that I'm in tears. It was perfect. Fucking PERFECT! Can NOTHING go right for one on this show?! I have been driving myself crazy looking of a figurine since it's such a central prop to my senior show and now I am back at square fucking ONE! My senior show is cursed, I swear!

I'm not so upset that I can't considerate on my paper for mythology class. DAMNIT!

THIS is the reason I hate ebay and why I don't like using it.

You know... my mother does something that I just can't STAND when she does. I can't STAND it, cus she makes it seem like I'm an idiot sometimes.

Every time that I say something that's the RIGHT thing, she always passes it off that it was her idea. And in turn, she has said something that is the WRONG thing, she tells people it was ME that said it.

I can't STAND it! She just did it now and I had a mini flip out on her.
I HATE it! Ugh!

In other news, I'm actually going OUT tonight. With FRIENDS. Do you know how long it has been since I went out with friends? A LONG time! Don't wait up, we are going to a late movie.

Today was one LOOOONNNNGGGG day. And you know what the only thing I really have to say about it is?

The Sheetz taco salad is HIGHLY disappointing without sour cream and black olives. Damn them for not having sour cream and black olives.

That is all

Wee! I got the work call I've been hoping for! Orientation this weekend, all weekend. Gonna make about $200. Maybe more. Judy has the tendency to tack on extra hours when I have to work a shift over 12 hours. Which I do this time... 13.5 on Saturday. I'll get to see Rene and Hannah as well, so that shall be fun ^.^

OH my GOD! I swear if the net is gonna do that EVERY night, I'm moving in with my father so I can use the cable at nights!

All the rain and the heat are fucking with my net connection! Damn dial-up!

This happens EVERY year around this time. It will connect and disconnect whenever it feels like it, never when I want it to. It seems now that the issues are lying not in GETTING connected but in staying connected. I can get to the VAA and surf around there pretty fine, but other websites... it kicks me off when I try to get to it.

I HATE when my net does this! Damn you summer!

And now... a serious/pensive moment from mind of Amby...

You know, I really find myself missing having people to go out with. This summer has really been a bust for all the plans that I wanted to fulfill. This is probably going to be my last summer here long as I get that internship. I have done some things (like Ubaldo) but I had so many other things that I wanted to do with my friends here before we parted ways until God knows when. Central Park, Niagara Falls, Atlantic City... they are all not gonna happen now and it really depresses me.

And now that I'm in this class, it kills everything else my summer might have held. While it's not a hard class, it takes up two days of my week and another two with reading my assignments. I really don't think I can do the Bistro show (which I really did want to do) because of it. It's just... what ever I had left of my summer I would have to give up for Beauty and the Beast and I just don't think I can do that. If something just happened to come up and I wasn't free to do it, I'd kick myself for it. Not to mention that I would need to give up my 21st birthday and I would have to work the three days before I leave for Vegas. Add to that getting the things together for MY show, the constitution needs to be retyped, I want to work for Jude whenever she calls (she said she'd have a few good jobs for me once we started the new fiscal year and we just did so I'm expecting calls sometime soon). I just feel so terrible about this. It's gonna be the last chance I would get to be in a show up there, but I feel like that I can't really put my heart into it and I don't want to do something when I can't put my heart into it 100%. I haven't really decided yet. I have till Friday. I just don't know.

God, you know I... I just can't stay here. Even if I don't get the internship... I don't think I can stay here after I graduate. The more and more I think about it, I just can't. I've grow beyond this place. There is nothing more left here for me. I don't know where I would go. Maybe New York. I don't know. California is more and more appealing as well. Or I can always just try and get a normal job down at Disney. All three places would have some friends, so at least I wouldn't be alone.

And ya know, I guess that leads me to something positive... there HAS been an upside to not having people to go out with. A very good upside. Not going out at night means that I find myself online more and in iparty more and while I have been finding myself becoming more distant from some, I'm becoming closer to others. And I like that. I like that a lot. I'm starting to see that my fear that I've had for the longest time about not having friends when I leave this area is not gonna happen. It's making leaving look more and more appealing.

God, I'm so much more pensive over this stuff then I should be. I need a nap. Or a drink. Or... something.

Geez, I thought I'd have a nice day home by myself. No family to mess with me. All I had to do was sit with Dutch for a little while and turn the air on for her. Then it had to go and rain and the basement had to FLOOD on me and I end up up to my ankles in water trying to save as much as I could and get the water out of the basement in bucket loads.



This is what the wall looks like right now. I could just hear it RUSHING in on the other side of the cinder blocks. I think the wall might be caving in. Party.

Also, I was just DYING of heat up in my room. Since no one else is home, I moved my computer down to the living room to work in. Wee! It's so cool in here.

Happiness to LAURA on this the day of her birth! :-D

Whoot! I got like the LAST copy of Melissa's CD! Thank God I got online when I did.

Now, ya see? Complaining about the customer service I was given REALLY paid off.

I had finally gotten a hold of someone yesterday afternoon, and they overnighted the phone to me free of charge because of all the stress and trouble they caused me.

I have my phone back ^.^ Same number and everything. AND I didn't loose any of my numbers. Thank the LORD.

I was MAD before... NOW I'm just FUCKING PISSED BEYOND PISSED!

Person #4 said "Call back in 2 hours."
Why? Because they fucking CLOSED in an hour and a FUCKING half!

How DARE the customer service people instead of helping me with my problem tell me to call the FUCK back when they know very well that the offices will be FUCKING closed!

I am in cell phone hell and Satan is the AT&T customer service department!

After my morning call from Doc, the phone kinda shut itself off. When I went to turn it on a few hours ago and all I got was a white screen. I took it to the store at the mall and they said I had to call for a replacement. So we went to dinner, got home, and HELL began!

Got on the phone and started talking to person #1. He said he would transfer me to the warranty department. I hold. I end up back at the start and start talking to person #2. He said he would transfer me to the warranty department. He hung up on me. I called back and got to talking to person #3. He was nice enough to stay on the line with me until the transfer went through. Transfer brought me... BACK TO THE START AGAIN! Started talking to person #4! I felt bad for that guy cus by now I was FLIPPING and I was yelling at him. I was an hour into it by now. He said he would stay on with me until I was actually talking to the right person. On hold. He comes back and tells me that the transfer was not working and it was sending us back to the start. NO SHIT! Told me to call back in two hours.

When I call back... if this shit happens again... GOD help the person that is the unlucky one to take my call.

I'm using mom's cell phone until I get the replacement phone: 570-766-0257
Call me there or on my house phone if you need me: 570-383-7751

I love getting early morning wake up calls, but only Doc and Judy 'Wanna work?' early wake up calls.

Today's call? From Doc. What am I doing? Helping her finish this newsletter she wants to make for this upcoming year. How MUCH? Well let's just say tomorrow I'm working 2-5 but I'm gonna get paid like I'm working all week :-D

I love my job.

...omg. Star Wars Robot Chicken is the BEST!

We had a funeral for Hole befitting of a fish of mine. We put him out under the rock near were Samantha and Ass are, we put some flowers in the hole with Hole... mom and I sang "Left Behind" from Spring Awakening. It was a good time. We then came inside and ate shrimp. In Hole's honor ya know?

It is the end of an era my friends.
After her long battle with drowpsy... Hole the 13 year old carvinal fish has passed. She now swims with Ass in that great fishbowl in the sky.


Hole
(August 2nd 1993 - June 17th 2007)

Swim towards the light Hole!